Liberals Still Irrelevant; Former PM Remains Classless

"Peace in our time! Peace in our..." Oh, shut up.

You know, I used to vote Liberal (except under Mulroney). But I have a hard time supporting this bunch of political mannequins.

The beauty of Liberal politics is that they pretend to be the voice of all moderate Canadians and people buy into it. What a bunch of poutine. I'm a hardcore moderate and they ain't speaking my language. The Liberals are what we call fence sitters extraordinaire. They stand for nothing and everything. The promise you the moon and the sun and give you a moon rock worth no more than a loonie.

Liberal politics equals stagnant status quo. It means steering a ship into the waters of sheer nothingness.

So now they voted in Stéphane "I'm The Constitutional King and don't you forget it" Dion. Who would have thunk it? They had a chance to really change the Liberal identity under Michael Ignatieff (or Kennedy for that matter)but instead went with a Chrétien left over. Look, I'm sure Dion will bring some integrity back into the Liberal ranks but he's not my idea of a leader.

It would have been a fresh change of scenery. Instead, we get the same old 'plus ça change' act. The Liberals are like the Democrats in many ways. They refuse to properly rally Canadians behind a strong, coherent message. Nothing they say in the last 15 years resonates with me.

Say what you want about the Conservatives but at least you know what you're getting with them and at least you know all efforts are there to change some parts of how we conduct politics here. Look, I am aware that liberalism and conservatism is dead up here. I know it's a mumbo-jumbo collection of quasi-intellectual hodge podge of stuff - if you get my drift.

However, at least the Conservatives have begun to act like, well, conservatives. The Liberals act like they are still driving around in daddy's car: "Hey, I don't need to change. My daddy owns the paper mill."

Canada is like a bad vaudeville act sometimes. Like those performers long past their prime still clinging on to the notion they still matter - "Mammy, mammy!" Canada sold its soul down the river long ago. So all this may be a facade anyway.

Nonetheless, I feel compelled to ask: what the hell were they thinking? Dion has the personality of a twist tie. I shouldn't complain I guess. At least they didn't vote for former NDP leader Bob Rae. Very scary that an NDPer can run for the Liberal leadership. How does that work out exactly? Aren't the Liberals total big business just like the Conservatives? If Bob Rae was elected I would have pulled a page out of the Hollywood playbook and escape to France. Er, wait. That doesn't make sense.

Alas, this is Canada. Where public apathy runs high.

Speaking of pathetic Liberaletti's, how about former PM Chretien coming out of the barn to insult Harper like he did? Ah, Liberal political bantering at its finest. Nice joke, Jean. You know, the one about wanting to call Harper George W.? So passé. So mature. Or how about his daring attempt to claim that Canada's international reputation has suffered under Harper? What, in just 11 months? Man, that was quick. The only problem Harper has is fixing the utter destruction of Canada's image abroad created by the Liberals. That's what you get with Liberals: arrogance and bad jokes.

They have not paid the price for what they did while in power. They literally siphoned millions of dollars from Canadians in various cynical schemes and scandals. In everyday street jargon we call this thievery. This is why they possibly permanently steered me away from the paleolithic Liberals. If the Conservatives pull that sort of stunt, I'm screwed; we're screwed.

In any event, I'm a confused and reasonable, optimistic skeptic when it comes to Canada. I keep hoping this country can make that last hurdle. Let's see where this Dion thing goes. Probably not much past Trois-Riviéres.