Day Care Update: Lending Nightmare

I asked for a small business loan for renovations and equipment.

On September 9.

It was supposed to take a couple of days. It's been over a month.

Bank red tape is a joke. I feel for the people in the branches. They're told to sell and "anchor" relationships, meanwhile the higher ups come up with all sorts of nonsensical red tape that interferes with establishing a solid relationship. They know how to name titles, "Personal representative" but there's nothing personal about it when the real decision is made by someone in some back office no one is allowed to meet.

From the get go my file had been mishandled - I found out, because I was proactive and called five days later, the person handling my file went on a sudden leave of absence. It devolved from that point. A real comedy of absurd errors. When it finally got back on track (it was decided to go for a government backed loan which apparently was "easier") and I faithfully did what was asked of me - four times - I was temporarily declined on a technicality.

Suddenly, the adjudicator wanted me to hire an accountant for, get this, my balance sheet. An effen, bull shit balance sheet which has nothing to do with nothing given A) I essentially have excellent credit, B) Have savings to back up the required 25% of the total amount requested B) Could get a co-signer if necessary C) Have a known, viable business and D) Had injected my own money into the business. I don't need them to launch the business, I need them to help pay for the reno's which were sprung on me at the last minute.

Yet, the guy, who barely knew how the government functioned with how they work with permits for private day cares, decided to be a stickler over my balance sheet. I'm told it's to see if I can really "run a business." The other reason was because since it's government backed, the bank had to follow the policies set forth by the government. Fair enough.

But tell me from THE START. Don't tell me to prepare "basic" cash flow statements and balance sheets by copying the exact examples on your website and then tell me ONE MONTH later, "Oh, you know? I think we want this prepared by an accountant."

I lost it.

I went into branch and basically said, "Are you going to bat for me or am I going to take this business up the street. Is someone going to be a leader and use vision here?" I had a nice chat with the person charged with my file. Everyone involved agreed my file was solid (from the business plan, to my personal situation and even to my projections) and that they were going to take care of everything. I went through enough. They acted courteously, professionally and with speed - which is what I wanted.

No screaming but I made it be known I was more than patient and was anxious to get this settled so that if in the end they did turn me down (which would stun me), I would make other arrangements. It turns out someone wants to invest with me.

At some point, enough is enough.

No?

The lady who took over (three people in total are working with me), spent all of Friday on my file. I appreciated it greatly. I had one question for her when we last spoke before the long-weekend: In your professional opinion, since you don't make the final decision and you're putting all this effort into this, is this file worthy of this small loan?" She answered in the affirmative.

We'll see.

It was mishandled but their response when notified was excellent.

Keep you posted.