Diaries of Max the Unemployed Guy

Welcome to the fucking fictitious life of Max the unemployed guy.

Hello. My name is Max and I am unemployed. I'm not lazy or anything - just a little off.

I resigned from my recent job as it was grossly and spiritually bankrupt. Well, that and because the stingy bastard wouldn't pay me. Everybody said I was brave but I know behind my back they think I'm bound for failure. I can't seem to fit into any construct humans have formed for themselves, be it school, social clubs or corporations. Needless to say, this has made advancing and excelling within those confines damn near impossible. This sucks because I have a lot to offer but can't find the proper vehicle (or people) in which to display this.

I wanted to be a cigar roller growing up. I should have pursued that dream.

I definitely have no luck. My sense of timing is off. I seem to march to another beat. People are always telling me how refreshingly bizarre I am. That's nice but being bizarre does not provide a steady income. Anyway, I have decided to bare my life on a daily basis with all from now on. Call me the Anne Frank for the unemployed and unemployable. That said, I remain positive. I know I am strong and talented. Now if someone would just listen to me.

Today I went to get a blood test. I have to wait seven to ten days for the results. Man, fasting for 12 hours was not easy. My arm hurts today. Ever notice how you tend to pick your nose more when you are home? The blood test went pretty fast and this threw me off guard as I was expecting at least a 1 hour wait. Then, I went home to rest as I wasn't feeling too good. After that, I went to buy some broccoli slaw. I listened to some music and played with my guitar for 20 minutes. I only know 3 notes. I plan to get real good. I stared out the window for about 12 minutes. I plan to look for work soon. Ooo, Magnum P.I is on. Bye for now.