Buying Espresso

Janna enjoys the finer things in life. She doesn't know much about anything but she tries. She frequents and only visits the high quality merchants in the city. Her husband, Harry, is a neurotic mess.

Janna sees the coffee tins in the aisle and jumps like a little school girl. "Hmm, look honey, there are so many choices of espresso coffee here. I just love shopping here. It's quaint."

Harry looks and stares at her. "Isn't that redundant?"

"What is?"

"Espresso coffee."

Janna shrugs and continues trying to select a coffee. She puts her finger to her lips. "Now, what should we buy?" Harry is already getting nervous.

"What's the problem? There are 9 different Italian roasts to choose from. I can't even tell the difference anyway."

"Oh, Har, it's important to be selective."

"Can you choose and let's go. As if you are a coffee connaisseur."

Janna sighs but refuses to budge. "You can be such a drag."

Harry usually has a hard time in aisles and this day is no different as people keep bumping into him. At one point, he's pinned against the other side of the aisle as a glut of carriages block the aisle.

Janna is unperturbed.

"I don't see the reason why we need to employ scientific reasoning to buy espresso. I mean..."

Janna grabs the shop owner and asks him his opinion on a couple of brands. The shop owner grabs them and begins to read the back of the tins. He finally admits he's never tried them. "Which one do you recommend?" she asks. The shop owner continues to examine the tins and proceeds to explain what the packages says. Janna thanks the owner.

Harry rolls his eyes."That helped. He read you the package. As if we can't read." He motions in the direction where the shop owner went. "We're not from the sub-Sahara. Thanks for nothing chump."

Janna finally settles on one. Harry takes the tin. "$14.95? For espresso? Are you nuts? What's wrong with the $5 one?"

"It's high quality from the finest company in Italy," she asserts.

"How do we know for sure it's the finest shop in Italy? Maybe they say this just to sucker us in with these artsy prices. Who can afford such luxuries?"

"We can. Let's go and stop making an issue of everything."

Janna and Harry head to the grocery line to pay. Harry is just about out of his mind. "We haven't moved. You realize we haven't moved. Right?" There's a pause. "Sometimes I wish I could just ram a carriage into someone who is taking too much time getting their money out."

Another pause follows. "I just wanna yell 'Move it, cunt!"

Janna is ignoring Harry while reading a magazine. "Stress kills. And you have a filthy mouth."

"Stress is having to wait in line with a $15 dollar coffee...Wha? Where is she going? Am I seeing right? They are closing our cash?"

Harry asks the cashier, "Where are you going?" The cashier answers, "Break. Union rules!"

"Union rules? UNION rules? Great, it's communism."

He signals to the manager. "I am not moving to the back of another line just because of some lame ass union rule. Either you open this cash immediately or we will no longer shop here. And we all know small shops like these need every customer they can get these days."

The manager glances at Janna and obliges. "I will assist you sir." He opens up the cash and they pay.

"As Harry rushes out the passage way narrows down like a funnel. Just as they are about to get to the door they are cut off by an elderly couple walking excessively slow. A couple of attempts are made to try and cut around the couple but backfires.

Harry will just have to wait an extra 30 seconds to get on with his life. Janna is just fine with hers. "I can't wait to get home and try my new coffee as she hugs the tin."